华人，还是马来西亚人？

以往放学时，有都会从后门速闪，可是今天我从大门离开，踏出讲堂，离开这具有深重意义的最后一堂课前，特地向前握了教授的手，当下的情况也只能用一句“谢谢”来代替千言万语。


我们打从小学开始就被灌输种族和谐的理念，尽管生活在一个多远种族的国家，可从小到大都活在自己的生活圈子里，从来没离开过大马华社半步，上课跟华人同学一起上，人住在檳島，就连逛街或者在街上游荡，看见的多数都是华人，极少接触异族文化，自然国语也讲的不流利。


思维逐渐发展，开始对时事产生兴趣时，却开始被政治洗脑。刚成年的我们还没踏出社会却被网路上一些种族极端主义和政治人物的种族言论清洗，还搞不清楚整件事情到底是怎么一回事，却已经自己认为大马不宜再居住。

中六毕业后，爱探险的我决定自己离开大马，看看这世界，开阔一下视野。

去了柬埔寨以后才发觉，自己国家其实没那么糟；听了捷克的民主革命经验后，才意识到一个国家迈向独立之路不简单；看见英国如何保护非洲移民的人权地位，才知道种族和谐来之不易；去了法国看见他们黑皮肤白皮肤通通都自认是法国人，才知道对自己身份认同的重要性。


我，是华人，还是马来西亚人，后者，成为了我在国际平台的身份。


接着大学开课了，那应该是我人身中真真正正体验大马多元种族与文化的开始，族群比例按照大马实况 6：3：1，不论在课堂里，食堂里，考场里都跑不掉这个比例，再无可逃避的情况下只好操着一口Rojak语言，坚持混了过来。

链接回文章的第一段，最让我感动的是这位教授，Prof. Mohd Ammyrul Ashraf。


这学期我报考了大马建国使（Nationhood Studies），那，是每位大学生的必修科，这科目被政府设定为必修科的主要目的是为了提倡种族团结与爱国精神。老实说，透过课本里的内容与考试的作答范围根本难以达到政府的目的，可是这位教授却把民族和谐的精髓成功的传达给我们。


还记得上第一堂课时，他问的第一个问题是：你，是什么身份。


教授点了几位同学们一个一个轮流回答，马来人的回答’我是马来人’，华人也很理所当然的回答‘我是华人’，接着他说你们都答错了，我们是马来西亚人！全班一片肃静，唤起了我对身份认同课题的共鸣。


他时常都会在班上分享有意义的故事与亲身体验，也时常苦口婆心的告诉我们要记得和谐的可贵，更有一次非常心痛的告诉我们他教过的学生尽然忘了他的教导，在社交网站挑起敏感又脆弱的种族话题。


学期的最后一堂课，他忽然告诉我们，来！现在我们来个小考！全班一片哗啦，糟了，上一堂课不是才小考吗？怎么搞的，今天又来？！接着，他告诉我们不需要紧张，你们的小考是认真的看这部短片，然后回去认真思考短片内容，接着，他便播放了一部关于华，巫，印，三位好朋友的故事。放学前他说：2020宏远，是事在人为，省略了其他科技通讯发达的元素，回归到宏远本身最初的出处，就是希望大马人民能够像短片里那三位好朋友，结伴同行，迈向更好的未来！


这句话，深深的烙印在我的脑海里，也非常的耐人寻味。


反问自己吧，你，是什么人？马来西亚在你心中的地位是什么？

Where to go?

Relationship. Love.

I don't know why these two words came into my mind tonight. I'm not watching any drama tonight, I'm not discussing about this topic with my friends tonight, but why these two words couldn't get out of my mind?

A busy mind i have. and I never thought that I'll have time for that. Maybe the hunger games had just came to an end, and I'm actually having a relaxing day after six weeks of battle. An empty mind is a devil's workshop. 

Sad but yes, a relationship to me, is a crime. At least for the time being.

I never had a real relationship. Ever. The friendship that came close to this status was years behind. Friendship? yes, not a relationship. It's simple, i guess. because i still have my first kiss with me.

I wouldn't mind getting into a relationship, seriously. Only if time allows me to. In fact, maybe I watched great dramas too much, the whole idea of a relationship, to me, is to walk my soul mate back home after a cocktail party; to spend silent moments together, allowing music to do the talking; to have a simple vacation, sharing every joyful moment; bothering about what to get for her when her birthday is arriving; go kayaking with her, spending an eternal lifetime in this picturesque lake; and being able to spend nights under the stars together.

Flashback!

Dear dear~ Its already the final half an hour before 2014 and I've just started to blog!

So what to blog about? Well, 2013 is really a good year to me, perhaps one of the most meaningful year in my life! Lets go through my timeline!

January: I've just came back from my Hong Kong trip with my family and STPM is over! I'm enjoying every moment of my life!

February: So I went to Sarawak, and this is my first phrase of my backpacking experience! being host by a local Chinese Sarawakien and met two friends from Sweden!

March: Went to Beijing with my mum in early March, first time traveling alone with my mum, and I'm the guide! It's freezing cold over there, too bad the snow was melting.
I went to Cambodia during mid March, alone! this is my second phrase of my backpacking trip, and also first time traveling abroad alone! backpack with two foreign friends, one from Canada and one from France. STPM result was released during my last day in Cambodia. I was so nervous! I received a few message congratulating me before I gain internet access to check my result. I got 4As! although not 4 solid As, but I was so happy! This is like a miracle! I cycle with a ranted bike with joy to Angkor Wat again(half an hour away from my hotel), just for the sake of my merryness! That moment is so special, my whole cycling journey is covered by my overwhelming joy, and I'll never forget!

Merry Christmas in UUM 2013

So this is the Youtube link to a video i made during Christmas Eve, a random act of kindness, the crazy thing I've been talking about in my previous post. Enjoy ~

A Man of Freedom

So my one week holiday is going to end soon, and I have to go back to UUM.
I'm so reluctant and I don't feel like going back.

My best friend Hean Tee asked me why, well, that's a good question.

First, you have to know the life in UUM. Well, there's curfew in my university, lights off after twelve. Although the authorities seldom check on us, but you feel guilty if you are not in your room after twelve. Even though you are not afraid of that and think that the school is busy enough to leave us alone, where can you go without a car? There is no entertainment within 10 Kilometers radius after twelve around you, and the nearest cinema is 45 minutes drive away from your hostel!

Dear authorities, I'm a man of freedom, in the age of twenty, I've been to 16 countries over three continents.  TEN countries and TWENTY ONE cities over two continents on 2013 itself.  No one gets to stop me where I want to go and I'm able to go alone. Culture different is not a problem and I have no problem walking alone in a country where they don't even share a common language that I know. I've met pickpockets, robber, scammers, poor, wealthy, nice guy and all different kinds of people and situations, and I manage to survive them all without a problem.

I couldn't say that I'm the best and I'm always right because I'm not perfect, but I believe that I've seen more then the others in the age of twenty and that's not the way to treat a mature guy by locking a freeman in a cage.

This is not how a university life should be, this is not how I imagine my life would become.